Warning: This story contains distressing details from the start.
Dominique Pelicot, the 71-year-old man accused of drugging his wife to sleep and recruiting dozens of men to abuse her for over 10 years, has admitted to all the charges against him in his first testimony since the trial opened on 2 September.
Referring to the 50 co-defendants who are accused of raping his now ex-wife Gisèle, Mr Pelicot said: “I am a rapist like the others in this room.”
“They all knew, they cannot say the contrary,” he said. Only 15 of the 50 defendants admit rape, with most saying they only took part in sexual acts.
Of his ex-wife, Mr Pelicot said: “She did not deserve this.”
“I was very happy with her,” he told the court.
He begged his wife and family to accept his apology, saying: “I ask for forgiveness, even though it is unacceptable.”
Gisèle, who was given the chance to respond shortly after, said: “It is difficult for me to listen to this. For 50 years, I lived with a man who I would’ve never imagined could be capable of this. I trusted him completely.”
Although no cameras are allowed in court, the trial is open to the public at the request of Gisèle Pelicot, who waived her right to anonymity at the beginning of the proceedings. Her legal team said opening up the trial would shift the “shame” back on to the accused.
As she stepped out of the courtroom during a pause in the hearing on Tuesday, Gisèle was met by applause from onlookers, and she smiled as she accepted a bouquet of flowers.
Since the trial began, Gisèle has become a symbol of resilience and courage. Last weekend, thousands of people gathered in cities across France to show their support to her and other victims of rape, and the trial has ignited a national conversation on marital rape, consent and chemical submission.
Mr Pelicot, who is a father and grandfather, began his testimony by telling the court of traumatic childhood experiences and said he was abused by a male nurse when he was nine years old.
When asked about his marriage to Gisèle, Mr Pelicot said he considered suicide when he found out she was having an affair.
Throughout his testimony on Tuesday morning, Mr Pelicot repeatedly assured the court that he never “hated” his wife and was in fact “crazy about [her]… I loved her immensely and I still do.”
“I loved her well for 40 years and badly for 10,” he added, apparently referring to the decade during which he drugged her and abused her.
Mr Pelicot was then questioned by Stéphane Babonneau, one of Gisèle’s lawyers, who asked him why he had been unable to find the will to stop abusing her, even when she started presenting medical problems.
In previous sessions of the trial, Gisèle said she had been worried she was developing Alzheimer’s or a brain tumour because of hair and weight loss and large memory gaps. These were, in fact, side-effects of the drugs her husband was giving her.
“I tried to stop, but my addiction was stronger, the need was growing,” he said.
“I was trying to reassure her, I betrayed her trust. I should’ve stopped sooner, in fact I should’ve never started at all.”
Mr Pelicot is also accused of drugging and abusing his daughter, Caroline, after semi-naked photos of her were found on his laptop. He has previously denied this and on Tuesday he also stated he had never touched his grandchildren. “I can look my family in the eyes and tell them that nothing else occurred,” he said.
Mr Pelicot also said he “became perverted” when, in 2010, he met a male nurse on the internet who suggested he drug his wife with a sedative, explained how to administer it and shared photos of drugged women. “That’s when it all clicked,” Mr Pelicot said. “Everything started then.”
In one section of Tuesday’s hearing, Mr Pelicot was also asked about the thousands of videos he filmed of men abusing his unconscious wife. These were found by investigators and were instrumental in tracking down the 50 men who are now accused of rape.
Mr Pelicot recognised he had filmed the men partly for “pleasure,” but also “as insurance”.
Throughout the morning, Mr Pelicot appeared determined to rebut one of the main lines of defence of several of the accused, which hinges on the premise they did not “know” they were raping Gisèle – in other words, that they thought they were having consensual intercourse with her.
Mr Pelicot met the defendants on a chat room called “Without her knowledge” on a now-closed website which hosted pornographic material.
“I didn’t force anyone, they came to look for me,” he said on Tuesday. “They asked me if they could come, and I said yes. I never handcuffed and dragged anyone.”
Some have said they were “manipulated” by Mr Pelicot into believing they were taking part in an erotic game in which Gisèle was only pretending to be asleep because she was shy, and several denied they knew they were being filmed.
But Mr Pelicot said the only person he ever “manipulated” was his wife, and also said that the men must have known they were being filmed: “There was a tripod and a screen attached to it, everyone could see it as soon as they walked into the room.”
Mr Pelicot said he wanted to prove that his wife “was a victim and not an accomplice. To prove that everything happened without her knowledge. I’m aware many [defendants] have disputed this.”
Béatrice Zavarro, Mr Pelicot’s lawyer, told French TV that she did not know what people would think of her client, but that he was “sharing his truth”.
She added that Mr Pelicot was “very downtrodden” and that although she did not know what his wife would make of his request for forgiveness, “the confession is now under way and he will continue.”
She said: “We will get to the end of this trial and we will know everything about Dominique Pelicot.”
Mr Pelicot, who was diagnosed with a kidney infection and kidney stones, was absent from court for nearly a week because of illness. He is set to give his testimony throughout the day, although he will be allowed frequent breaks.
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