Before marriage entered my eyes, I had to settle some areas of concern.
I want to share them with you.
But before then,
If you’re single, leave your soft comfortable cushion and gum your bum on that small kitchen stool. This message needs to enter you well well.
Those who are already married, in case you didn’t talk about what I’m going to share, you will find some wisdom in it that would suffice for your journey.
I have made terrible mistakes in relationships, chopped breakfast brekete and learnt from them.
Falling in love is easy but being in love is work. It is that work that you must do that I want to open your eyes to.
Ready?
1
Keep Your Eyes Opened For Red Flags.
You must have been hearing Red flags, left, right and centre and it is sounding like one tiring village gong, don’t be tired o. Red flag is Red flag. You see erhn, when you love someone, it can be hard to look objectively at your relationship and notice potential dangers. But when it comes to something as serious as marriage, it’s crucial that you don’t go into in blindly. I was watching and studying Sunshine for 2months before I finally asked her out. Those times were enough to say, okay I have known this person 50%.
2
Know That Loving Someone Is A Choice
When you’re married, it’s unrealistic to assume that every day will be filled with super lovey-dovey romantic feelings. Remember that you can make the choice to love your spouse, even on the “bad days.” It is not everyday that you’d be in love with the one you married. Other days you’d wonder why you even got married. That WHY is what you must answer before you even jump in and don’t tell me you married her for her big buttocks or potatoes sized breast. Your WHY for marrying him/her must be weighty and purposeful.
3
Talk About The Future Before Committing To It
I can still remember talking about the future together. I showed her my online work and how far I have done it. I told her I am a public figure whose destiny is tied to the progress of many. She isn’t much of an online person but she accepted to work with me wholeheartedly. For nothing, Sunshine gives me good food and FOOD to make posts that are worthy of reading. So it’s important to have a conversation with your partner about what you both want for your future together, where to live, how many kids to have, etc. If those visions don’t align, it might not be meant to be.
4
Only Get Married If You Really Want To
Marriage isn’t for everyone, yes o. Some are eunuchs, Rev. Fathers and Sisters out of their own volition. Listen to me, no one should pressure you to get married. Truth is that, things are bound to end poorly. So only get married if you truly want to be married and have the abilities to withstand the emotional, physical, spiritual and financial obligations.
5
Try To See Things From Your Partner’s Perspective
You will both argue from time to time. They are inevitable, but if you’re able to take a step back and view things from your partner’s perspective instead of just your own, you’ll be able to navigate conflict in your marriage much easier. And if you find yourselves arguing a lot to the point of insulting one another. Honestly, take a break and reevaluate if you really aren’t going YÃ baleft.
6
Trust Is Essential
You want to get married to someone you can’t trust with money, your phone, your life, your everything? You wouldn’t want to make that kind of mistake. If there are any trust issues in your relationship, it’s better to resolve those before tying the knot.
7
Communicate What You Want In Your Marriage
There’s a huge difference between knowing what you want for your marriage and being confident enough to communicate that and setting unrealistic, unfair, and even unspoken expectations for your partner that you want them to meet. Personally, i love good food. I told my wife, she said no problem. She is also a great cook. Then she told me how she is a Song minister in the RCCG Parish and wouldn’t want to leave the church or have her man attend a different church.
I was born Catholic and didn’t want to let go so I chose to leave the Catholic Church, join the RCCG and be married to her. Guys, I stated this to say: open your mouth and say what you want in your marriage.
8
Use Your Individual Strengths To Lift Each Other Up
The perk of partnership? When the going gets tough, you can each use your individual strengths to help support one another. And it’s OK if that support feels lopsided at times: an equal partnership doesn’t necessarily mean effort is always 50/50.
9
Mutual Respect Is Mandatory
You will not respect and honour the one you married? Your head must be painting you. If one of you doesn’t respect the other, it’s unlikely that your marriage will be able to survive in the long-term. The same goes with submission in marriage.
10
Discuss Finances Before Marriage
Money matters are not always easy to talk about with your partner, but if you’re planning to get married, it’s absolutely crucial that you’re on the same page about money and are aware of one another’s financial habits and history. My wife and I have different orientations about money and savings. I had to teach her something more superior, she adopted it and it is helping us. We hardly quarrel about money-related issues at all because each person is open with his/her money.
11
Don’t Let Minor Disagreements Become Major Rifts
It’s normal to argue with your spouse, but it’s important that each time you have a disagreement, you’re able to talk it over and find a solution together because if you never resolve them, even your smallest fights can cause major rifts in your relationship down the line. All those sweeping issues under the carpet at all times, the day it will ch0ke, you’d wonder why the little disagreement became a strong issue.
There are loads of them but I found these ones very significant.
It is not like I have the best of marriages, there are others better than mine but I am very happy with my choice and how I plan to make it last.
I believe you will marry well however, you need knowledge to apply wisdom and understanding appropriately.
Run with these ones quickly.
Peoplesmind
