A former First Lady of Ekiti State and a women’s rights activist, Bisi Fayemi, tells ABIODUN NEJO about her support for women and children, her husband’s time in office and other issues
What were your most notable projects as the First Lady of Ekiti State?
During my time as First Lady of Ekiti State, my work revolved around three key areas− policy advocacy, community development, and capacity building.
In the area of policy advocacy, I worked with government officials and civil society leaders to create an enabling legal and policy environment for the well-being of women and girls in the state. During the two terms my husband served as governor of the state, there were at least seven gender-friendly bills that were passed into law. They include the Gender Based Violence Prohibition Law (2011), which was revised in October 2019; Equal Opportunities Bill (2013), and the HIV Anti-Stigma Bill (2014). I also supported the passing of the Treatment, Care and Protection of Sexually Abused Minors Law (June 2020), Ekiti Mental Health Law (October 2021), the Ekiti State Political Offices Gender Composition Law (March 2022), and the Multiple Births Trust Fund Law (October 2022).
I started Keep Girls in School, an advocacy initiative, which attracted the attention of the World Bank, that would provide funding for Ekiti State for over five years for various projects to support the education and retention of girls.
I also introduced Drop the Blades programme to end female genital mutilation, which has seen the empowerment of up to 250 ex-circumcisers as an incentive to stop the practice.
My projects on community development attempted to meet the needs of Ekiti people in poor and marginalised circumstances. I initiated the Multiple Births Trust Fund, which has supported hundreds of families with multiple births, helped establish the Funmi Olayinka Wellness and Diagnostic Centre, started the Obinrin Kete Women’s Economic Empowerment programme with 3540 beneficiaries in all 177 wards of Ekiti State, and ran a Food Bank for the Elderly (Ounje Arugbo), which provided food for 1,100 elderly people every month.
In the area of capacity building, through my efforts, a good number of women have held elective positions as deputy governors, House of Representatives member, State House of Assembly members and in local government councils.
Ekiti women have also been well-represented in the State Executive Council, boards and parastatals, and senior cadres of the civil service.
Also, I was the convener of the Forum for Women in Leadership, Forum of Spouses of Ekiti State Officials; while I influenced the establishment of Young Women in Politics, a network of over 5,000 young Ekiti women. In addition, I encouraged the establishment of the Ekiti Female Elders Forum to ensure that elderly Ekiti women in politics are not marginalised.
What were the most profound experiences you had as the First Lady?
There were a number of them, but I will mention two. During my husband’s first term between 2010 and 2014, I started working on sexual and gender-based violence, and the GBV Law was passed in the state.
That was the first time issues having relating to GBV were discussed openly in such a conservative society. During my husband’s second tenure (2018-2022), there was an immense amount of goodwill and support from Ekiti people, because they felt that they had a champion and a voice who was consistent. This made it a lot easier to continue the advocacy and campaigns. In all my years as a women’s rights activist, I got to understand what breaking the culture of silence in local communities felt like.
The second profound experience was a painful but necessary lesson in understanding the difference between true friends and political acquaintances.
How did those experiences and lessons shape you?
Things don’t always go the way we planned. Resilience, patience, being willing to learn and having a spirit of forgiveness is important.
What were your takeaways from leading the campaign to enact the Gender Based Violence Prohibition Law in Ekiti State?
The GBV Prohibition Law was passed in October 2011, and revised in October 2019, in order to domesticate the Violence Against Persons Prohibition Law of 2015. We cannot make any headway with the SGBV pandemic if we do not have laws in place, and implement them with strong political will.
During the two tenures of my husband, there was strong political will. There were also champions of the cause, such as the governor, the then Attorney-General, Wale Fapohunda (SAN), as well as other notable personalities.
One of the most important achievements was the permeation of the message right down to the grassroots. Due to the fact that victims and their families knew they would be heard, the culture of silence on those issues was broken in ways that we had never seen before. When that happens, one also have to be able to respond appropriately.
The Ekiti State government established a Sexual Assault Referral Centre (Moremi Clinic) at the Ekiti State University Teaching Hospital, Ado Ekiti; as well as two satellite Sexual Assault Referral Centres, at the General Hospital, Ikole-Ekiti, and General Hospital, Ikere-Ekiti.
I also facilitated the Ekiti State Shelter for Women and Girls. In 2013, I established the Ekiti Social Inclusion Centre− a temporary shelter for women in distress. This led to the establishment of a permanent shelter, a 208-bed Transit Home and Vocational Centre for Women and Girls in November 2020. The project was undertaken by the Office of the Senior Special Assistant to former President Muhammadu Buhari on SDGs, Her Excellency, Mrs Adejoke Orelope-Adefulire. I am eternally grateful to her for all her support.
In what ways did you help your husband to carry out his vision as governor of the state?
I supported my husband in various ways. Aside from what I did by virtue of my passion for the well-being of women and children, I was given various responsibilities.
I chaired the Ekiti State Gender Based Violence Management Committee for the implementation of the GBV Law in the state, as well as the Ekiti State AIDS Control Agency. I also served as Chair, Ekiti Values Orientation Committee which produced a values orientation roadmap and school textbooks for Ekiti State in 2021.
Also, I lobbied for the creation of a full-fledged Ministry for Arts, Culture and Tourism, and I served as Chairperson of the Ekiti State Technical Consultative Committee on Arts, Culture and Tourism between 2011 and 2014, which helped define a strategic framework for how Ekiti State would develop those areas. That paved the way for the annual Ekiti Festival of Arts and Culture, which attracted the National Festival of Arts and Culture to Ekiti State in November 2021.
It is important for leaders to identify with their people during various milestones, and in addition to what governors can do, I moved around the state a lot to support people, especially women.
There is a high level of poverty in Ekiti State, especially among women. What were you able to do about the situation?
Poverty is a problem in all states of Nigeria; but even more so in a rural state like Ekiti. Majority of our people live in rural areas, and we also have farmsteads in the state that are hard to reach, coupled with other challenges. I visited many farmsteads and supported cooperatives of women with grants for them to use as revolving funds. I also started the Obirin Kete Cooperatives for poor women in all the wards of the state. I also advocated for women to benefit from all the federal and state government economic empowerment initiatives.
What inspired you to set up the African Women’s Development Fund with two other colleagues?
I co-founded the African Women’s Development Fund in 2000 with Joana Foster from Ghana (of blessed memory) and Hilda Tadria from Uganda. We wanted a funding organisation that would support the ideas and aspirations of African women activists, thinkers and grassroots mobilisers. Most of the donor partners who were supporting social justice work on the continent at the time could not fund small and medium-sized women’s groups, because of the bureaucracy involved. AWDF was a women’s fund that grew out of the women’s movement to respond to the agendas set by African women.
What were the highpoints of your tenure as the Executive Director of AWDF?
There were many. During my tenure, we became a professionally run, well-resourced and credible women’s fund, with a diverse range of donors, and large number of grantee partners. We also launched an endowment campaign, which enabled us to purchase real estate in Accra (Ghana), as well as have our own investment fund. That solid foundation paved the way for what the organisation has become today.
At a time, you were the Executive Director of the African Women’s Leadership Institute. What were your major contributions to the institute?
I helped to establish the African Women’s Leadership Institute in 1996, when I was the Executive Director of Akina Mama wa Afrika based in London, United Kingdom. The AWLI was the Africa programme of AMwA and it was a training, capacity building and networking forum for young African women. AWLI was able to produce at least 6,000 women leaders across the continent, with many of them becoming ministers, legislators, academics, civil society leaders, senior civil servants and employees of international organisations. The current Vice-President of The Gambia, Issatou Touray, is an alumnus of AWLI.
As a United Nations Women Nigeria Senior Advisor, what were your responsibilities?
In that role, my task was to help UN Women Nigeria shape their women and political participation strategy in the country for the period of 2017 to 2023.
Despite your advocacy for women, your writings show that women’s rights are still an unfinished business. How does that make you feel?
Yes, women’s rights is still unfinished business. It makes me feel sad and angry, because we keep making progress, then reversals. However, we need to keep pushing forward because women and girls deserve better, and we cannot achieve any of our development goals if we are not prepared to invest in women’s empowerment. We all need to agree that for our country to move forward, one gender cannot be continuously sacrificed in order for the other to rise. One cannot clap with one hand. It is foolish to believe that men alone can lead and govern without the support of women. That is one of the reasons there is so much chaos around us.
What is your assessment of the present level of women’s participation in politics?
I am disappointed in the dismal numbers of women we have in politics and governance. Our political structures are maintained by women, but they are rarely allowed to reap the fruits of their labour. Nigerian women are ready and willing to lead, and our leaders should encourage, not discourage them.
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In your article titled, ‘Where is your Wrapper’, you wrote about the things that make us human beings. Why do you think it gained such wide acceptability?
I think the essay struck a chord with many people, both men and women. It is about our responsibilities towards one another as human beings, the need for us to be able to cover the metaphorical nakedness of the next person, bearing in mind that at one point or the other, we might need a wrapper too. It is a call for solidarity, support and communal responsibility. I have been to many places where people have told me how the wrapper metaphor has helped them. I am humbled by that, and I will continue to spread the message.
Despite your tight schedule, you have written many articles and books. How do you find the time to do that, and what inspires you?
One will always find time for the things that matter to one. It is just the same way some men, regardless of their status, find time to stay glued to the television watching sports; while some women afford to spend hours getting their hair or nails done. Writing means a lot to me. It gives me the opportunity to get lost in my thoughts, and to read and learn something new, so that I can reflect on them and tell stories. I get inspiration from everything that happens around me.
Ekiti State has a new First Lady. How sure are you that the programmes and initiatives you created will continue, considering that continuity in government is a huge deficit in Nigeria?
The current First Lady, Olayemi Oyebanji, is also passionate about those issues. She will continue to be a strong advocate to ensure that political will to mitigate SGBV does not wane. I am very confident that she will take the campaigns and implementation to the next level.
Divorce and cases of spousal abuses are on the increase in society. What is responsible and what do you consider to be the solution?
It is a complex issue. Our society and values are evolving, and we should expect that all our institutions will change as well, including marriage. We cannot expect things not to change. This generation of young women will not put up with the shenanigans of violent, entitled and selfish men. They watched their mothers suffer in silence for so long, putting up with all kinds of indignities. I certainly do not want any daughter of mine to put her life at risk by staying with an abuser. Marriage can be wonderful when there is genuine love, mutual respect and support. Marriage is not supposed to be a prison or slave plantation. There is also a lot of peer pressure, and I see young people getting married for the wrong reasons. As parents, we should stop pressurising our children to get married, and young people should avoid competing to be the next bride or groom in town. Many people can show up for the wedding, but only two people and God can make a marriage work.
How did you meet your husband, and what were the qualities that endeared you to him?
Me and my husband met as post-graduate students at the University of Ife (now Obafemi Awolowo University), Ile Ife, Osun State, in 1986. He was (and still is) brilliant, focused, God-fearing, kind and handsome.
What is the most romantic gesture your husband has shown you?
When we got married in September 1989 in London, United Kingdom, we could not afford a honeymoon. Ten years later, in September 1999, he handed me two envelopes. I opened them and they were tickets to the Bahamas. He said, ‘I am sorry it took so long. But, let us go on our honeymoon’.
Why the choice of the Bahamas?
That is not for me to answer. My husband chose the destination. It is a beautiful Island, and we enjoyed every moment we spent there.
When you first met, did you have any inclination that he would go into politics?
Not exactly, but I knew he had a bright future, because he had such an admirable work ethic, and he was passionate about leadership as service.
Did you initially support your husband when he went into politics and opted to be governor?
I had a few doubts when he raised the issue with me, but I decided that if we were going to see any progress in society, we needed more people like him to go into politics.
How do you feel whenever your husband is criticised or attacked by political opponents?
It is only trees that bear fruits that people throw sticks and stones at.
After his first tenure, your husband lost his re-election bid; but won the election four years after. How did you feel then, and what lessons did you learn during that period?
The major lesson I learnt from both experiences is that power belongs to God. We might have our own aspirations as human beings, but who gets what and when is not in our hands.
Would you encourage your son to go into politics?
Not really, but it would be entirely his choice.
Do you have any plans to run for elective office?
No. I am more interested in leadership and capacity development for other leaders.
How has life been since your husband left office in October 2022?
I feel a huge sense of relief, fulfilment and gratitude for the opportunity to have supported my husband to serve.
What does your current schedule entail?
I continue my interests as a women’s rights activist, policy advocate, social change philanthropist and writer, through the Above Whispers Foundation, which I established in 2016. The foundation coordinates The Wrapper Network, an online platform which provides mentoring, capacity building and financial support for women.
There is also an oral history project that we started in 2020 called ‘Memories of the Living’, which documents the lives and experiences of elderly people in our communities, who otherwise would never be seen or heard of.
Recently, I was approached by one of our development partners in the country to help explore ways in which traditional institutions can help in the implementation of laws and policies to protect women, especially the laws on sexual and gender-based violence. More on that will be revealed in the coming months.
I also have obligations to various bodies, where I serve as a board member or advisor, such as the Presidential Advisory Council on Gender, African Women’s Development Fund, Elizade University, African Women Leaders Network, Women at Risk Foundation, Women’s Radio and King’s College, London.
You are 60, but look much younger. What is the secret?
The older one gets, one has to make more of an effort to take care of oneself, especially for health reasons. I eat well, exercise, and do not sweat the small stuff. I inherited good skin from my mother, and I do not use harsh skin products that can end up making one look older than one is.
Looking back, what are you most grateful for at 60?
I am grateful for family, friends, good health and all the opportunities I have been given to make a difference.
Do you have any regrets?
I regret that my father is no longer here. I miss him so much.
What advice do you have for young women out there?
There are no shortcuts to success, and hard work never goes unrewarded. Also, don’t believe everything you see on social media. Just be yourself.
Peoplesmind
Credit ~Punch